Positive Parenting Discipline (Ages 13 to Up)

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Whatever the age of your child, it's important to be consistent when it comes to discipline. If you don't stick to the rules and consequences that you set up, your child isn't likely to either.



Ages from 13 to Up


By now you've laid the groundwork. Your child knows what's expected and that you mean what you say about the consequences of bad behavior. Don't let down your guard now — discipline is just as important for teens as it is for younger children. Just like the 4-year-old who needs you to set a bedtime and stick to it, your teen needs to know boundaries, too.

Set up rules regarding homework, visits by friends, curfews, and dating and discuss them beforehand with your teenager so there will be no misunderstandings. Your teen will probably complain from time to time, but also will realize that you're in control. Believe it or not, teens still want and need you to set limits and enforce order in their lives, even as you grant them greater freedom and responsibility.

When your teen does break a rule, taking away privileges may seem the best plan of action. While it's fine to take away the car for a week, for example, be sure to also discuss why coming home an hour past curfew is unacceptable and worrisome.

Remember to give a teenager some control over things. Not only will this limit the number of power struggles you have, it will help your teen respect the decisions that you do need to make for him or her. You could allow a younger teen to make decisions concerning school clothes, hair styles, or even the condition of his or her room. As your teen gets older, that realm of control might be extended to include an occasional relaxed curfew.

It's also important to focus on the positives. For example, have your teen earn a later curfew by demonstrating positive behavior instead of setting an earlier curfew as punishment for irresponsible behavior.





[Generated from kidshealth.org
Reviewed by: Jennifer Shroff Pendley, PhD
Date reviewed: June 2005
Originally reviewed by: Steven Dowshen, MD, and Jennifer Shroff Pendley, PhD]